A Mother's Love (part 2 I think?...)

My mother and I had been going back and forth for a couple of months about her visit to me, when I realized a week ago that I am actually off school for her birthday, and could come down for a week. This is what followed:

So after discussing this at length with Kenny it just won't work for you to come here and stay until you and Kenny resolve your animosity towards each other. What happened during our visit there for your wedding was not good and you and I have at least been able to move beyond it and have a relationship. Kenny has not had any resolution or discussion with you about this and he feels that you hate him and have not apologized to him for what was done and said. You also need to realize that I am happy with Kenny and am staying with him. I am not moving back to Washington, I am not looking for anyone else in my life. I love you and want you to be able to come and visit me but it is his house too and I can't force him to be uncomfortable around you. I am sorry it is this way, I really want both of you in my life and it is very difficult to be in between the two of you.

Love,

Mom

This was my response, before I cried, before my mother-in-law drove allllll the way to my house just so "I know I deserve a momma hug"....She really is wonderful, no matter how hard I try to push her away because I don't believe in mothers:

I don't even know what to say to you right now. So I'll keep it short:

Thank you for putting another man before me.

Thank you for not realizing that Andrew too dislikes you, feels no resolution in his relationship with you, but loves me so much that he put that aside while you were here visiting this summer.

Thank you for proving to me that regardless of how much hope I have for you, you will never love me the way that I deserve.

Oh, and Kenny can fuck himself. To tell you that you have to accommodate his feelings toward your child while his LIVE WITH YOU!?!?!?!??! At least you have Cam and Christ now, what do you need me for?

Have a wonderful summer. I don't think I'll be able to talk to you for a while(again). I am so at a loss that you would do this to me again Mom. I really thought you had come to a point where you were strong enough to separate the men in your life from your daughter, even if it meant taking a little bit of flack from a man to see me. But why would it change now? Robert told you to get rid of me, and you did. Frank told me to move out because I was the only source of conflict in your marriage, and you had nothing to say. Why would Kenny be any different.

I am so hurt, and in turn so angry, I am more angry with myself above anything because I keep giving you chances and keep overlooking the fact that you don't say you're sorry, and keep wanting things that you will never be able to give me regardless of some stupid sappy email you sent me last Christmas that you have already rescinded.

Oh, and thank you for at least having the decency to call me and tell me this.

Heather.