On the Up and Up

Things have been good lately. Not that anything much has changed, just me. Oh and the fact that we found a home community we love (some parts more than others), and have started going back to Imago...well, we are going back to Imago but maaaaay have missed yesterday because we went car shopping. After which we decided that we just need to be a bit more patient and save just a little more so we can just buy the right car outright.

I had this dream last night, it was terrible. In the dream I was married to Andrew, but I had been away from him working or volunteering or something for a couple of months, and about half way through the separation "he" showed up. And we spent all of our time together, and talked until the wee hours of the morning, and just had fun. We stayed in a room with 3 other people, all of us on the same trip/project/whatever, and one of them being his best friend. I shared a bed with another girl, so no funny business ever happened, but it was still kinda sketch. One morning he and I woke up earlier than everyone else and went out for breakfast where we sat together at an outdoor cafe and read the paper(just like I always imagined it would be). When we snuck back into the room before everyone else woke up, his friend rolled over and said

"Oh girly girl-you are living in a dream. This will all come crumbling down around you in a matter of seconds."

While he and I sat there silently feeling the shame of being known, Andrew burst in the door, looked at us(not caring that there were other people there) and in shock said the words "I see how it is. Ok!," then turned around and walked out.

I ran after him. He wouldn't look at me. I felt like I was chasing my home, the one who actually matters, that the other guy was so irrelevant that I didn't even stop to look at him before I ran after my amazing husband...he finally stopped and I admitted that I was wrong, but that nothing had happened(physically). He accepted it and we talked it through, but it was so gut-wrenchingly real that I woke up with my stomach in a huge knot and covered in sweat.

It's a good thing that my dreams are so vivid-they teach me the reality of things that I would never be able take back.

My husband is sexy hot.