It's Official

I have meniere's. I cried about it a while ago, and now it's just like this really crappy waiting game:

-will it get worse?

-is this it?

-will I fall into the category who start out unilateral and move to bilateral hearing loss?

-will I need hearing aids, or worse?

I wouldn't be so dramatic aside from the fact that the average age to "get" Meniere's is between 30-50.

Positives:

-we know what's wrong with me (at last. I want to go back to those two witches who treated me like an obese cow-sighting my weight as the "real problem.")

-we can figure out what to do

-we know what to expect, sort of

-I am now on a medication. Water pill, supposed to maintain healthy fluid levels, all it's doing is making me nauseous. Gross. Mark that as a positive/negative, thus far.

-We're going to really push the landlord to let us get a dog now. I have a "medical" reason for one. I've been finding that I am increasingly afraid to be alone at the house overnight, or even alone at the house after dark because I'm not hearing the little things. Like if there were someone outside I'm not hearing the little noises. I also for the life of me cannot hear the kitchen timer in the other room, or in most cases-someone knocking. So if you come over-ring the doorbell. Anywho, I want a dog. A guard dog. And a gun....but a dog first. Training a dog takes more time than purchasing a gun.

-I'm not crazy.

-I was right in my self diagnosis-I love it when I'm right :)

Aside from all of that we're just settling into it. Andrew refused to accept it until the doctor said so(smart man) because of what this could actually mean for us. I have started to realize that I've had tinnitis for a while, I just don't notice it anymore, until I think about it. I had thought for quite a long time that silence had a sound....just a realllly high pitched single tone sound....Andrew told me I'm wrong. So I can hear it whenever I think to notice it now, and now I find it really annoying....lol. Which means I just don't think about it often. And I'm moving on...

School re-starts in 1.5 weeks, and I'm not excited. I need the credits, but I'm not excited. I'm trying to find a good balance between resting and getting ready for the term, and seeing friends. We'll see how that goes.